Best jokes ever

A crocodile has 2 eyes and 80 teeth. Question: What has 80 eyes and 2 teeth? Answer: A full bus of old men.
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More jokes about: age, animal, old people
What fits your schedule better...... Exercising 1 hour a day or being fat 24 hours a day?
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More jokes about: fat, time
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't because it won't come.
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More jokes about: animal, dog, food
Teacher: “How do you spell “dog”?” Boy: “D, o, g, enter.”
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More jokes about: school
Why did the blonde have square boobs? She forgot to take the tissues out of the box.
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More jokes about: blonde
It was a hot summer night. Slowly I spread her legs and my hand was trying to find its way to her nipple... I was so excited! I never milked a cow before...
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More jokes about: animal
How many women does it take to change a light bulb? 11, 10 to form a committee and 1 to get her boyfriend to do it..
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More jokes about: women
A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. "You'll get your chance in court." said the Desk Sergeant. "No, no, no!" said the man. "I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I've been trying to do that for years!"
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More jokes about: cop, lawyer, wife
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls, and sat down next to of all people a beautiful, you guessed it, blonde. The blonde kept looking quizzically at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls." Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him thoughtfully and finally, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, asked, "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"
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More jokes about: blonde, golf
I've recently got a stalker. He's everywhere all the time. And his thing is that he sends other people to profess his love for me. So I can be walking down the street and all of a sudden a lady will appear screaming: "JESUS LOVES YOU."
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More jokes about: life