Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
A: She fell in the sink.
What do you get if you cross a skunk and a cartoon penguin?
Pingu-Pong.
What happens when sharks take their clothes off?
They go sharkers.
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called "Man, The Master of Womem"?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
If you stare at the ameican flag long enough you'll see a 3D image of Chuck Norris.
Vote:
Yo mamma so stupid she puts a piece of paper on the TV and says, "I'm watching paper-view."
Vote:
A plastic surgeon invented a radical new face lift procedure and was explaining
it to a prospective patient. He told her, “I’ll install a special screw in the top
of your skull. Your hair will cover it so it will be unnoticed. Whenever you need
a little tuck, we’ll just tighten the screw a little,… and the wrinkles will disappear!”
The woman was enthused and told the doctor to, “GO FOR IT!” The surgery
was a resounding success, and the woman went home happy.
A few months later, the woman returned in a great state of agitation.
She pointed to her face and said, “Just look at these bags under my eyes!
Where the hell did they come from?”
The surgeon looked at her closely and said,
“Those aren’t BAGS under your eyes.
Those are your breasts.
And if you keep messing around with that screw,… pretty soon you’ll have a goatee!”
Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
Vote:
Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
Vote:
Q. Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?
A. Because she blows the horn!