A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then he asks the bartender to prepare another double martini.
After he finishes that one, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and asks the bartender to bring another double martini.
The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all Night long.
But you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill."
The man replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife.
When she starts to look good, then I know it's time to go home."
How do you prevent a Lawyer from drowning?
Shoot him before he hits the water!
Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
What do you call a smart blonde?
A Golden Retriever.
Old lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal.
A life? Cool… Where can I download one of those?
You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
Yo momma’s so fat, she sells shade in the summer.
What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
Chuck Norris invented his own type of karate.
It's called Chuck-Will-Kill.
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