The Golfer asked his Caddy, "Hey boy, do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday? Caddy replied, "The way you play, Sir, its a crime any day of the week!"
Q: Why does a dog lick himself? A: He can't make a fist.
My husband has a split personality – and I hate both of them.
How many cop jokes are there? Just two, all the rest are true!
Why fart and waste when you can burp and taste?
How do you know you’re flying over the poorer part of town? You see toilet paper hanging on the clothes lines.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - three times.
I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman… “Mr Cook?” “Yes,” I replied. “I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.” I said, “That’s bullshit – my dog doesn’t have a bike!”
Tom to Dick: ‘My mother made me a homosexual.’ Dick: ‘If I bought her enough wool would she make me one as well?’
"Yo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sunbath!