How do you starve a black person?
Put their food stamps under a job application.
Gods walking around heaven taking a stroll and sees a little black baby all sad and depressed sitting on a curb, God asks him whats wrong the black boy says i wanna be a angel, so God snaps his fingers and the boy gets wings he is all excited, and he says am i an angel?
God says NO NIGGA YOU A BAT!
When Chuck Norris gets nominated for the ALS ice bucket challenge, the bucket donates $1000 to ALS research.
Vote:
Chuck Norris doesn't play dead for bears, bears play dead for Chuck Norris.
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The actual definition of U.F.O is Chuck Norris's Toy Frisbee.
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Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A: So they can stand closer to the sink.
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
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Men are like buses.
One comes every 15 minutes.
If toast always lands butter-side down and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast to the back of a cat and drop it?
Q. Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?
A. Because she blows the horn!