Q: What is the most erotic number?
A: 2110593!
Q: Why?
A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay at10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3.
How do you remove one thousand flies in one motion?
Slap a Kenyan in the face.
Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
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Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb.
On his penis.
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Yo momma’s so stupid, she called the 7-11 to see when they closed.
Do you know how Hitler tied his tennis shoes?
In little Natzie's.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
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Why are blacks afraid of lawn mowers?
Because it goes run nigger nigger run.
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My ex girlfriend has a tattoo of a shell on her inner thigh.
If you put your ear up to it... you can smell the ocean.
Three men stranded on an island.
They were walking across the sand when they came across a magic lamp; they rubbed the lamp and out came a genie.
The genie said "you have three wishes but make it quick."
So they thought about what they were going to wish for.
The one man said, "I wish I was at home with my family."
So the genie said your wish is my command, and he was gone, then the second man said
"I wish I was in the pub with my mates."
So he was gone.
The last man said, "I am lonely and I want my friends back."
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