C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit.
My husband and I married for better or worse. He couldn’t do better and I couldn’t do worse.
Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom? They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.
Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
I saw the priest watching pornography. Should I get jelous? -Johnny, 11 years old.
A man in a balaclava with a gun asked, "Are you a Protestant or a Catholic?" "Neither, I'm a Jew." "But are you a Protestant Jew or a Catholic Jew?"
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
I love blacks. It's a pitty they are not being traded anymore...
Q: Whos the richest man in Mexico? A: The person who gets the penny.