Chuck Norris sank the Titanic on a late afternoon swim.
Vote:
Q: What is a crowbar?
A: A place were crows go to get a drink!
Yo' Mama is so dirty, they won't even use her bath water for waterboarding.
The Animal Crackers that Chuck Norris eats are made from real animals.
Vote:
A doctor and a lawyer are involved in a car crash.
The lawyer, seeing that the doctor is a little shaken up, offers him a drink from his hip flask.
The doctor accepts, has a drink and hands back the flask.
The lawyer puts it in his pocket.
‘Aren’t you having one yourself?’ asks the doctor.
‘Sure,’ says the lawyer. ‘But I’ll wait till after the police leave.’
Yo momma's so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in the way that they are looking forward to it.
A lady went to see a tarot reader woman who'll predict her future:
Lady, I'm sorry to inform you that your husband will die in the near future.
Don't tell me things that I already know, tell me if there would be an investigation!
I've got a new anorexic girlfriend.
Its not going too well though.
I'm just seeing less and less of her ...
Yo Mama so old...
She was once a waitress at the last supper.