Best jokes ever

Golfer: "I'd move heaven & earth to break 100 on this course." Caddy: "Try heaven; you've already moved most of the earth."
Vote:
has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: golf, heaven, sport
For a weddin' present Ledbetter gave his son Amos two hundred dollars. Two weeks later he asked him, "W'atcha do with the money, son?" "Ah bought me a wristwatch, Pappy!" answered the boy. "Yew dumb ignoramous!" yelled his father. "Yew should 'av bought yourself a rifle!" "A rifle? What fer?" "Suppos'n one day yew cum home and find some guy sleepin' wid yore wife," explained the older redneck. "W'atcha gonna do? Wake him up and ask him what time it is?"
Vote:
has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: money, redneck, time, wedding
First Caribou: What kind of math do owls like? Second Caribou: Owlgebra.
Vote:
has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, math
E only equals MC² because Chuck Norris allows it too.
Vote:
has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, science
Yo mama is so dumb she makes u look like a genius.
Vote:
has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: stupid, Yo mama
Q: How is Yo' Mama like the New York Jets? A: You give them a quarter, and they'll let you score.
Vote:
has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife. "You just won't believe what happened this evening, in all my years on the force I've never seen anything like it." "Oh yes dear, what happened?" "I came across two guys down by the canal, one of them was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks." "Drinking battery acid and eating fireworks! What did you do with them?" "Oh that was easy, I charged one and let the other off."
Vote:
has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: cop
Yo momma’s so ugly, yo daddy takes her to work just so he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.
Vote:
has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
Why did the blonde stand in front of the mirror with her eyes closed? She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.
Vote:
has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Yo' Mama is so ugly, she can only grow hair on her nuts.
Vote:
has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
<<<698699700701
More jokes →
Page 698 of 1426.