A pregnant lady learns from her dentist that she needs a root canal. She says to the dentist, "darn ... I'd just as soon give birth as have a root canal". The dentist replies, "well, make up your mind so I know what position to put the chair in".
Yo mama is so dumb she makes u look like a genius.
E only equals MC² because Chuck Norris allows it too.
Why did the Mexican push his wife off the cliff? Tequila
Two blondes were running from the cops as they had just been caught sneeking over the border into Mexico. They dashed up to a fence and climbed over it, lights and sirens running behind them. As they arrived on the other side, they came face to face with a long river. One blonde said to the other. "Here I'll shine this flashlight over the water and you can walk accross the beam of light." The other said: "What do you think I am, stupid!? I'll get halfway accross and you'll turn it off!"
What’s the difference between a bar and a g-spot? Most men have no trouble finding a bar.
A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife. "You just won't believe what happened this evening, in all my years on the force I've never seen anything like it." "Oh yes dear, what happened?" "I came across two guys down by the canal, one of them was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks." "Drinking battery acid and eating fireworks! What did you do with them?" "Oh that was easy, I charged one and let the other off."
Q: How is Yo' Mama like the New York Jets? A: You give them a quarter, and they'll let you score.
Yo momma’s so ugly, yo daddy takes her to work just so he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.
Why did the blonde stand in front of the mirror with her eyes closed? She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.