Chuck Norris once had a pet monkey...his name was KING KONG
Chuck Norris once hit 3 touchdowns during a friendly game of full-contact bowling.
Q: What did Jack Frost say to Frosty the Snowman? A: Have an ice day!
Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.
A man runs over a cat. The cat’s address is on its collar so the man goes to apologise to the owner. He knocks on the door and a little old lady answers. The man says, ‘I’m so sorry. I’ve just run over your cat. Can I replace it?’ ‘I don’t know,’ replies the old lady. ‘How are you at catching mice?’
Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
What a woman says… This place is a mess! C’mon! You and I need to clean up! Your stuff is lying on the floor and You’ll have no clothes to wear if we don’t do laundry right now! What a man hears… blah blah blah blah blah C’MON! YOU AND I blah blah blah blah! blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR blah blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah blah blah blah RIGHT NOW!
Chuck Norris caught all the pokemon with a Nokia 3310.
What's a rabbits favorite musical? Hare.