Yo' Mama is so nasty, her mouth is like an Almond Joy bar full of nuts.
Yo' Mama is like a race car: she burns through four rubbers a night.
I could have been your daddy, but the line was too long.
A third old woman, full of happiness, asks her granddaughter; "My sweety, remind me please.. What’s the name of that German guy that blew my mind off...?"
"Alzheimer, granny!"
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Q: What's the difference between a brown-noser and a sh*thead?
A: Depth perception.
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How do you know you're at a bulimic bachelor party?
When the cake jumps out of the girl!
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Yo mama's so fat when people look at her they instantly got cancer and type two diabetes
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Yo mama's glasses are so thick she can see into the future.
I have joy in my heart and a glass of wine in my hand.
Coincidence?
Why does Santa have such a big sac?
Because he only cums once a year
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