Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
A man runs over a cat. The cat’s address is on its collar so the man goes to apologise to the owner. He knocks on the door and a little old lady answers. The man says, ‘I’m so sorry. I’ve just run over your cat. Can I replace it?’ ‘I don’t know,’ replies the old lady. ‘How are you at catching mice?’
Q: What game did the dentist play when she was a child? A: Caps and robbers
Chuck Norris CAN handle the truth.
Q: Why won't Easter eggs go out at night? A: They don't want to get "beat up".
Chuck Norris caught all the pokemon with a Nokia 3310.
What's a rabbits favorite musical? Hare.
Yo momma's so fat... The animals at the zoo feed her.
Why do cows think cooks are mean? They whip cream!
Q: What was the dentist doing in Panama? A: Looking for the Root Canal!