Best jokes ever

A preacher was giving a sermon to a full church when all of a sudden the devil appeared. He was menacing and threatening and the entire congregation started to flee the church except for one old man. When the church was empty the devil went up to the man and asked "aren’t you afraid of me, I’m evil incarnate, the most horrific being in the universe and will most likely torture you!" The man replied "You don’t scare me, I’ve been married to your sister for 35 years."
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has 55.88 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: age, church, marriage, time
Chuck Norris was asked if he would be running for President, after a chuckle, he stated, nothing makes him run.
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has 55.88 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, political
Q: Did you hear about the the evangelical atheist? A: She went door to door with a book full of blank pages.
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has 55.88 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: atheist, bible, religious
Q: Why do police dogs lick their balls? A: To get the taste of negro out of thier mouths
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has 55.87 % from 220 votes. More jokes about: black people, dog
In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love. In college it means someone is too drunk to stand on their own.
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has 55.87 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: beauty, college, drunk, love, school
Are you a candle? Because I want to blow you.
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has 55.87 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex
Q: What happens when spectroscopists are idle? A: They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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has 55.87 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, communication, nerd
A man's wife asks him to go to the store to buy her cigarettes. He walks there only to find it closed. So, he goes into a nearby bar to use their vending machine. At the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers and eventually end up in her apartment. After they've had some fun, he realizes it's 3 a.m. and says, "My wife's going to kill me. Do you have any talcum powder?" The woman gives him some talcum powder, which he rubs on his hands and then goes home. His wife is waiting for him in the doorway and screeches, "Where the hell have you been?!" "Well, honey, it's like this. I went to the store like you asked, but they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I saw this great looking chick there, we had a few drinks, one thing led to another, and I ended up in bed with her." "Oh yeah? Let me see your hands!" She sees his hands are covered with powder and says, "You liar! You went bowling again!"
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has 55.86 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: beauty, marriage, wife, women
Q: How was break dancing invented? A: Little black kids stealing hub caps off of moving cars.
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has 55.82 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: black people, car, insulting, kids, mean
Q: Whats worse then a barrel of dead babies? A: There is one at the bottom that is still alive. Q: Whats worse then that? A: He has to eat his way out. Q: Whats worse then that? A: He goes back for more.
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has 55.79 % from 294 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, food
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