Q: What do you call a buncha Blondes in a freezer? A: Frosted Flakes.
"Jeff, my child, your mother had to stay in the hospital for a few days, cause the stork that brought your baby brother bite her by accident." "Oh, gosh! What a terrible thing to happen to her after such a difficult birth!"
A blonde takes her typewriter to the doctor. "Doc, I'm afraid my typewriter is pregnant." The doctor asks, "Why in the world would you think that?" She says, "Because it's started missing its period."
Q: Why are two blonde girls fighting on a motorcycle? A: They are fighting because they both want to sit next to the window.
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
Yo mama so fat, that when she got on the titanic, it sunk right away, and the only reason that this story is different is because the people who've told others about it were scared that she would sit on them.
Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs. They come on when HE wants them to.
Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in the way that they are looking forward to it.
Yo mama is so fat she has to write an apology letter to Japan.
Dad shouts ..."STOP WATCHIN P*RN....I CAN HEAR IT IN MY ROOM!" Son: Dad...I am NOT watching p*rn... That is Maria Sharapova playing Tennis!