Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
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What do you get if you cross a zebra with an ape man?
Tarzan stripes forever.
How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed.
If there's something strange...
In your neighborhood... Who ya gonna call?...
CHUCK NORRIS!
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Two cannibals were having lunch.
"Your wife makes a great soup," said one to the other.
"Yes!" agreed the first. "But I'm going to miss her terribly."
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If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
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Chuck Norris can sit at the corner of a round table
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Daylight Savings happened when Chuck Norris overslept an hour.
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There is a way to kill Chuck Norris, it is...
Sorry, the person typing this just had his head bashed in by a roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people.
They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
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