Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
When Chuck Norris goes to the DMV, they take a number.
The Terminator said, "I'll be back" because he saw Chuck Norris was coming.
What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? When you take sausage out of the fridge it doesn't fart.
Chuck Norris jumped off a building once. The ground didn't make it.
What's the best way to catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on him.
Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
What's yellow, comes from Peru, and is completely unknown? Waterloo Bear, Paddington Bear's forgotten cousin.
Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies? A: A rotisserie chicken.
It's 4:04. Do you know where your auditor is?