The best animal jokes

Q: Why did the atheist throw her watch out the window? A: She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.
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has 26.99 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: animal, atheist
What do you call a bear with no teeth, a gummy bear!
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has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
On the street strolls a chick dressed with fur from head to toes. Near hear another chick stops and says to hear: Do you imagine how many animals they had to kill for this coat? But do you know with how many animals I had to sleep with for it?
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has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
What did the dog say to the hot dog bun? "Are you pure bred?"
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has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
A plowhorse, a honeybee and an old geezer are debating about which of them is the greatest. 
The horse says, "I can plow all day long to provide food for dozens of people!" "
The bee says, "I pollinate all the plants every year and make honey besides!" 
 The old geezer says... (We're waiting...)
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has 26.76 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, horse, old people
One day a blonde, brunette, and redhead were stuck on an island 100 miles away from civilization. The only way to get home was to swim. The brunette swam 50 miles before drowning. The redhead swam 64 miles before getting attacked by a shark. The blonde went 99 miles but got tried a swam back to the island.
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has 26.75 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, ginger
When does a female deer need money? When she doesnt have a buck.
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, money
Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About eight beers.
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, beer
Q: What side of the cow gives the most milk? A: The utter side.
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has 25.81 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Bad Zoo 1. When no one else is looking, you swear that the monkeys are mocking you. 2. The Bears exhibit is nothing more than the guys cut from the football team during training camp. 3. The stripes on the zebra tend to peel away in the heat. 4. The Zookeeper always wants to take the Rhino for a walk. 5. The Lion in the lion cage closely resembles the one from The Lion King. 6. The alligator in the Reptiles exhibit is nothing more than the University of Florida's Mascot. 7. If you deposit 50 cents, the giraffe will magically appear and talk to you. 8. Ask the Tour Guide too many questions and you're suddenly dipped in some sort of sauce and placed in the Tigers den. 9. The Elephant appear to be two guys in a two part Elephant suit. 10. Two words: Hippo Dogs!
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has 25.81 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, money, soccer
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