My cat can talk. I asked her what two minus two was and she said nothing.
A Bosnian catches a goldfish. The goldfish says: "Let me go and I will grant you one wish." The Bosnian says: "No way, I'll take you to the pawn shop – gold is gold."
Your house is so dirty I saw rats on dirt bikes.
Q: Why are dogs such bad dancers? A: They have two left feet.
What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside? A: An elephant in a plastic bag.
YOUR MOMS HOUSE IS SO POOR I WENT TO KNOCK ON HER DOOR AND A ROACH TRIPPED ME AND A RAT TOOK MY WALET.
What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses? If one bit you, you could ride it to hospital!
Q: What did the bird say after his cage fell apart? A: "Cheap, cheap!"
Yo mama so stupid that she mourned wen we slaughtered a goat for Cristmas.