Your house is so dirty I saw rats on dirt bikes.
Bad Zoo 1. When no one else is looking, you swear that the monkeys are mocking you. 2. The Bears exhibit is nothing more than the guys cut from the football team during training camp. 3. The stripes on the zebra tend to peel away in the heat. 4. The Zookeeper always wants to take the Rhino for a walk. 5. The Lion in the lion cage closely resembles the one from The Lion King. 6. The alligator in the Reptiles exhibit is nothing more than the University of Florida's Mascot. 7. If you deposit 50 cents, the giraffe will magically appear and talk to you. 8. Ask the Tour Guide too many questions and you're suddenly dipped in some sort of sauce and placed in the Tigers den. 9. The Elephant appear to be two guys in a two part Elephant suit. 10. Two words: Hippo Dogs!
What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
What's gray and powdery? Instant Elephant.
Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside? A: An elephant in a plastic bag.
A cow and a horse were galloping around a curve opposite to. They landed in each other. Who was wrong? The cow, it didn't blow its horn.
What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses? If one bit you, you could ride it to hospital!
Q: What did the bird say after his cage fell apart? A: "Cheap, cheap!"
In what type of weather is the vet the busiest? When its raining cats and dogs.
Yo mama so stupid that she mourned wen we slaughtered a goat for Cristmas.