Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside?
A: An elephant in a plastic bag.
Q: What did the emu say to the nurse?
A: Mend her bones or walk the plank
Q: How do you get ten fat cows in your basement?
A: Hold a tupperware party!
What do you call a dinosaur drinking Tequila?
Tyrannosaurus Mex.
YOUR MOMS HOUSE IS SO POOR I WENT TO KNOCK ON HER DOOR AND A ROACH TRIPPED ME AND A RAT TOOK MY WALET.
What is a zebra?
26 sizes larger than an ‘A’ bra.
I had to go round next door and look after my neighbour’s cat while he was away.
Now there’s a great pile of crap and a puddle of wee on his kitchen floor.
Hopefully, he’ll think the cat did it.
On what should you mount a statue of your cat?
A caterpillar!
A plowhorse, a honeybee and an old geezer are debating about which of them is the greatest.
The horse says, "I can plow all day long to provide food for dozens of people!"
"
The bee says, "I pollinate all the plants every year and make honey besides!"
The old geezer says...
(We're waiting...)
Vote:
Q: Why did the duck go to Brooklyn?
A: To buy some quack.