The best animal jokes

What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Deer Nuts are always under a buck.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal, beer
Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About eight beers.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, beer
A blind man was describing his favorite sport - parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: "I am placed in the door and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me, and out I go." "But how do you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I have a very keen sense of smell and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground," he answered. But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?" he was again asked. He quickly answered "Oh, the dog's leash goes slack."
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal, sport
Why did the frog walk across the road? He didn't... he jumped.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers? From professional courtesy.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal, lawyer
What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Spot!
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
My cat can talk. I asked her what two minus two was and she said nothing.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why are dogs such bad dancers? A: They have two left feet.
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has 24.18 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, music
Three animals were having a drink in a cafe, when the owner asked for the money. I'm not paying," said the duck. "I've only got one bill and I'm not breaking it." "I've spent my last buck," said the deer. "Then the duck'll have to pay," said the skunk. "Getting here cost me my last scent."
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has 24.15 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, duck, money
Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside? A: An elephant in a plastic bag.
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has 24.11 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
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