The best animal jokes

When does a female deer need money? When she doesnt have a buck.
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, money
A blind man was describing his favorite sport - parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: "I am placed in the door and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me, and out I go." "But how do you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I have a very keen sense of smell and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground," he answered. But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?" he was again asked. He quickly answered "Oh, the dog's leash goes slack."
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, sport
What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Spot!
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
A Bosnian catches a goldfish. The goldfish says: "Let me go and I will grant you one wish." The Bosnian says: "No way, I'll take you to the pawn shop – gold is gold."
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
A plowhorse, a honeybee and an old geezer are debating about which of them is the greatest. 
The horse says, "I can plow all day long to provide food for dozens of people!" "
The bee says, "I pollinate all the plants every year and make honey besides!" 
 The old geezer says... (We're waiting...)
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has 25.91 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, horse, old people
Q: What side of the cow gives the most milk? A: The utter side.
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has 25.81 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Q: Why did the fat turkey cross the road? A: To get hit by my car.
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has 25.81 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, fat
What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses? If one bit you, you could ride it to hospital!
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has 25.67 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, hospital
There are two types of ostriches - Grey and Blue. Grey ones scared hide their head in the sand. The Blue ones sit in the bushes waiting for this moment.
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has 25.67 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What did the emu say to the nurse? A: Mend her bones or walk the plank
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has 25.67 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, nurse
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