The best animal jokes

A man is walking through a park when he steps in a pile of dog mess. He pauses to wipe his shoe on the grass and sees another man step into the same pile. ‘I just did that,’ says the man, so the other man rubs his nose in it.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man walks by a table in a casino and passes three men and a dog playing cards. ‘That’s a very smart dog,’ says the man. ‘He’s not so clever,’ says one of the players. ‘Every time he gets a good hand, he wags his tail.’
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
I had to go round next door and look after my neighbour’s cat while he was away. Now there’s a great pile of crap and a puddle of wee on his kitchen floor. Hopefully, he’ll think the cat did it.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you get if you cross a cat with a gorilla? An animal that puts you out at night.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
What looks like half a cat? The other half.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
On what should you mount a statue of your cat? A caterpillar!
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Deer Nuts are always under a buck.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal, beer
Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About eight beers.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, beer
Why did the frog walk across the road? He didn't... he jumped.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers? From professional courtesy.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal, lawyer
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