Who may open the door without using hands, nor legs? An invalid.
Smith was hit by a car, died, and went to heaven. And everyone who goes to heaven has to work. God went up to Smith, and said: Smith, you are going to make babies. Here is this wheel, and every time you turn it, a baby will come out. For hours, Smith spun the wheel at full speed, then he started to get tired. As he was slowing down, a black baby came out...and Smith said: **** I better hurry because they are burning."
Q: Why do you put babies into a blender feet first? A: So you can see the look in their eyes when you turn it on!
Knock knock. Who's there? Allahu Akbar. Allahu AK- BOOM!!!
Why would the cannibal only eat babies? He was on a diet!
What's pink and chunky? A baby with leprosy.
What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag.
What do you call of 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.
Went to a Muslim birthday party the other day. It was great fun, we blew up a bouncy castle and then had a really intense game of pass the parcel.
How the children from Chernobil count from one to hundred? On the fingers!