The best blonde jokes

There was blonde who wanted to go on a diet. She went to the doctor and asked for his advice. He said that she was going to go on a diet for three days. "Eat anything and everything you want for the first two days of your diet. Then skip the third day." So the blonde went home and ate anything and everything she wanted for the first two days, then she skipped the third day. The next day she went back to the doctor and he asked her, "How is your diet?" She said, "Well, the first two days were easy but that third day was hard. Doing all that skipping made me really tired."
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Q: What do you call a buncha Blondes in a freezer? A: Frosted Flakes.
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Q: Why do blondes always die before help arrives? A: They always forget the "11" in "9-1-1".
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Me: If a blonde girl and brunette girl jumped off a cliff at the same time, who would hit the ground first? Friend: I don't know, who? Me: The brunnete, the blonde had to ask for directions.
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A blonde calls a pizza place to have one ordered to her house. They ask her if she wants the pizza cut into 6 or 12 pieces and she says, "Cut it into 6, I could never eat 12 pieces."
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One day a Blonde went the doctor with a burn on her stomach. The doctor gasped and asked what happened. the Blonde told the doctor she put a lighter against her stomach. The doctor asked her why in the world she would do that. the blond said "I was trying to burn calories."
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Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes? A: Toes Go In First.
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A blonde walks into a restaurant to get some dinner, and while she's deciding on what she wants a waitress comes up. The blonde looks up and notices the waitress's name tag on her shirt. "Gee, that's nice. What did you name the other one?"
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A blonde and a both jump off a cliff at the same time. Which one will hit the bottom first? The brunette, because the blonde has to ask for directions.
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Why don't blondes like making Kool-Aid? Because they can't fit eight cups of water in the little packet.
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