Why did the blonde have square boobs? She forgot to take the tissues out of the box.
What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common? "You keep hearing about them, but never see any."
Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10? A. She picks up her purse and goes home.
Q: To a blonde, what is long and hard? A: Grade four.
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it, and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, “Is something wrong?” To which she replied, “There certainly is!” My stupid computer keeps saying, “You’ve got mail!”
Q: What did the blonde say to the physicist? A: "Why, I just love nuclear fission! What do you use for bait?"
A blonde was trapped on an island and had to swim 1000 miles to get back to the mainland. She swam 500 miles and got tired, so swam back to the island.
Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.
Q: Why is it OK for blondes to catch cold? A: They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.
A blonde wanders into a library and says, ‘Can I have a burger and fries?’ The librarian says, ‘I’m sorry, but this is a library.’ The blonde whispers, ‘Can I have a burger and fries?’