The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris once gave a man an apple. Today that man is known as Steve Jobs.
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The Animal Crackers that Chuck Norris eats are made from real animals.
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Justin Beiber screeched like a high-pitched girl the time he saw Chuck Norris. His voice is still up there today.
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Chuck Norris tells clocks what time it is.
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Chuck Norris can suck a black hole.
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The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
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Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a walkie talkie.
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Chuck Norris can pick "side" when flipping a coin.
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Chuck Norris is the reason there is wind. The air tries to get away from him as fast as possible.
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Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
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