Chuck Norris has 5 bathtubs, they are known as the Great Lakes.
The earth doesn't revolve around the sun. It's the sun that revolves around Chuck Norris.
After meeting with Chuck Norris' lawyer the UFC have changed their name from "Ultimate Fighting Championship" to simply "Fighting Championship."
If he wanted to, Chuck Norris could rob a bank. By phone.
Chuck Norris could actually win on Takeshi's Castle.
Somebody said that Chuck sucks, since then their severed head with many foot marks have been found...
Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
Chuck Norris went around the world... by standing still.
When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does. NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.