If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you.
If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack.
Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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If Chuck Norris killed Kenny, he'd stay dead.
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Chuck Norris stared in to the mirror and said, "There can only be one Chuck Norris."
Then his reflection cried and walked away.
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Chuck Norris froze hell.
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Dragons watch a movie called 'How to train your Chuck Norris.'
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Chuck Norris can skydive indoors.
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Chuck Norris can turn toast back into bread.
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