Superman is weakened when exposed to Kryptonite. Chuck Norris eats Kryptonite for breakfast without even a belch.
Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
If Chuck Norris misses a roundhouse-kick, you will still die.
Chuck Norris once got his arm stuck in a canyon. After 5 days of pain and agony, Chuck Norris had to amputate the canyon. It was a tough choice...
A black hole is where Chuck Norris ripped the universe a new one.
Chuck Norris can make you fold a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.