Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
Chuck Norris can turn a vegan into a cannibal.
Chuck Norris once had a weak moment, just to know what it felt like.
Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.
Chuck Norris won the Nascar season, he was driving a bike.
Chuck Norris' first words were... "Chuck Norris".
When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.
Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker, he puts the coffee beans in his mouth and boils them with his rage.
Chuck Norris once went to practice his golf swing at a driving range... his golf balls are now known as stars!