When Light wrote Chuck Norris' name in the Death Note, the book died.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
If Chuck Norris were to ever bungee jump, the earth would flinch.
Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
Chuck Norris can turn diamonds back into coal.
Santa Claus goes to the mall to sit on Chuck Norris' lap.