Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
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Chuck Norris uses the lethal injection to have a 5min nap.
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Chuck Norris has never used a question mark in his life.
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Chuck Norris has clicked the unclickable button... twice
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Chuck Norris can lie honestly.
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris can literally kill time.
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Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
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The Dead Sea was formerly known as The Living Sea.
Until it met Chuck Norris.
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