Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
Chuck Norris is a fact.
Gravity is Space's way of trying to keep Chuck Norris away from it.
Chuck Norris once gave a fire hydrant a ticket for being next to his parked car.
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
Chuck Norris once bowled a 300... Without a ball... He wasn't even in a bowling ally.
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
Superman is faster then a speeding bullet. Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
Chuck Norris is the four horsemen of the apocalypse!
Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.