Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA.
Chuck Norris can locate the nowhere.
Chuck Norris doesn't lift weights he tells his muscles to get bigger.
Chuck Norris can talk with his mouth closed.
Chuck was once on the Olympics and he won all the medals but he was disqualifyed for roundhouse kicking the judges because they misspelled his name.
Wanna know how Chuck Norris grew his beard? He didn't, his beard grew him.
Chuck Norris needs no further explanation.
When Chuck Norris talks, E.F. Hutton listens.
Not only CAN Chuck have his cake and eat it too, he WILL.
Lou Gehrig considered himself the luckiest man on the face of the Earth, no one knew that it was because he was soon getting away from Chuck Norris.