The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
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Dante's Inferno is based on a Nature Walk Chuck Norris once took.
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Q: What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object?
A: Chuck Norris is clapping.
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Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth.
The next day he won the lottery.
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Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
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If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till."
After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
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When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people.
He walks through them
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Chuck Norris beat a brick wall at tennis.
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Chuck Norris watched the entire Lord of the Rings without blinking.
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Suicide committed Chuck Norris.
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