There was no world recession, just Chuck Norris desiring a discount.
The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas. He just hired Chuck Norris.
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3." All was good.
Chuck Norris can tie your hands behind your back with both hands tied behind his back.
Chuck Norris always wins at Jenga, the tower couldn't dare to crumble.
Give Chuck Norris a piece of coal and he'll give you back a diamond.
Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.
Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident.
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.