Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
If Chuck Norris was a spartan the movie would be called "1".
Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity, he got it back.
Before his rise to fame, Jaws was Chuck Norris's goldfish.
Do you know why babys cry when they are born? Because they know they are entering the world with chuck Norris in it.
Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
Chuck Norris once fell off a ladder, it immediately became a chair and caught him out of fear.
Chuck Norris doesn't shave, his beard grows to the perfect length and stops.
Chuck Norris pitties Mr. T.
Chuck Norris' muscles are so developed that he's had intellectual conversations with them.