Chuck Norris is the only weapon allowed through airport security
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Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.
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Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil.
It couldn't keep up.
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When nature calls Chuck Norris hangs up.
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Chuck Norris beat Halo 3 on legendary, with a broken Guitar Hero controller.
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Chuck Norris went to the virgin islands.
Now they are pregnant.
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When Chuck Norris finishes his workout, the gym takes a break.
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Chuck Norris doesn't age, he levels up!
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When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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