According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it. Dissapointed, he then walked out.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Davie Jones is afraid of Chuck Norris' Locker.
Chuck Norris created the World Wide Web using a typewriter.
Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil. It couldn't keep up.
Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.
Chuck Norris went to the virgin islands. Now they are pregnant.