Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice from a banana.
Spilled milk cries over Chuck Norris.
People sell their souls to the devil. The devil sells his soul to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris' beard has it's own Social Security number.
All men are created equal. Equally inferior to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier. In half.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Every resturant has a drive thru when you're riding shotgun with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.