Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.
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Chuck Norris once shot someone with a knife.
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Chuck Norris won a staring contest with his eyes closed.
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Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
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Chuck Norris has a diary.
It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
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Clark Kent had to call himself "Superman" because "Chuck Norris" was already taken.
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When Chuck Norris falls into a puddle of water he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris.
This is just a joke, we know Chuck Norris doesn't fall..ever
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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
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According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
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