Chuck Norris jokes are a oxymoron because Chuck Norris isn't a joke.
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Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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Chuck Norris never actually moves.
He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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Chuck Norris can get up to level 40 in Fallout 3.
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Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.
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Love does not conquer all.
Chuck Norris does.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a case for his phone.
The ground is afraid to break it.
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In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats.
Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris.
There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
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