If Charlie Sheen is winning, it's only because Chuck Norris isn't playing.
Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
If you write the Death Note on Chuck Norris, the Death Note dies.
Kanye West interupted Chuck Norris and became Kanye East.
Chuck Norris can block Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook account.
Chuck Norris can open PDF files with Microsoft Excel.
Chuck Norris reached level 51 on Oblivion.
Ali Baba said "Open sesame" to open the secret entrance to the treasure, but little did he know that saying "Open Chuck Norris" opens all doors.
Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.