Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey.
He chews bees...
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Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get drunk.
He simply lowers his IQ to yours.
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Chuck Norris can breath out with his nose and breath in with his mouth at the same time.
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Chuck Norris went up Niagra Falls in a barrel.
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Chuck Norris had a knife thrown at him... the knife didn't impale him, he impaled the knife.
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Chuck Norris tells clocks what time it is.
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T. S. Eliot measured out his life with coffee spoons.
Chuck Norris uses a backhoe.
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Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
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Just announced that they are changing all the days of the week to Chuckdays.
Happy Chuckday everyone!
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