Davie Jones is afraid of Chuck Norris' Locker.
Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil. It couldn't keep up.
Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.
When Chuck Norris finishes his workout, the gym takes a break.
Did you ever wonder how the moon got craters? 3 words: Chuck Norris Golf.
Chuck Norris is the only person to really have "Birthdays". The rest of us have "Thank you Chuck for allowing me to live another year- days".
One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart. The clerk told him to have a nice day. The next day the clerk was found dead. The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why. He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
Chuck Norris does not get parking tickets; he gets "thank you for parking anywhere" notes.
Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity, he got it back.
Chuck Norris was born feet first. It was the only time a doctor died during childbirth.