The best part of waking up is not the Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
Chuck Norris shot an arrow down with an apple.
There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
Chuck Norris once went sky diving, he did not use a parachute. The spot he landed on is now known as the Grand Canyon.
If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real. It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was bitten by a cobra, cobra died after 5 days.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris can in fact eat water.