Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil.
It couldn't keep up.
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When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
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Chuck Norris can actually punch you in the soul.
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Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
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It is convenient to be near a hospital when you are injured.
It is also convenient to insult Chuck Norris while standing in an open grave.
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Chuck Norris CAN read Lady Gaga's poker face.
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Chuck Norris can make scissors beat rock.
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Chuck Norris does not play computer games, he makes games play computer!
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Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
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Chuck Norris crossed the road.
No one has ever dared question his motives.
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Q: What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with Chuck Norris?
A: Nothing. Nobody crosses Chuck Norris.
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