The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
Chuck Norris lives in a Roundhouse... And his favorite drink is punch...
Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident.
Before the 16th century, the sun really did go around the earth. Chuck Norris just decided to change it as a prank.
In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.
Chuck Norris beat a brick wall at tennis.
Chuck Norris went to the sun and spent two nights.
If you type Chuck Norris into Microsoft Word, the little paper-clip just hangs himself.
Chuck Norris can play volleyball with a bowlingball.
When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.