Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.
Dinosaurs once crossed Chuck Norris. Once.
A group of children once said, "Red rover, red rover, send Chuck Norris over." Those children were the dinosaurs.
When you have a question you check with Google. When Google has a question they check with Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris has a question everybody better run!
Chuck Norris can open Microsoft Windows when he needs fresh air.
Chuck Norris' day consists of 25 hours.
Mortal Kombat is not difficult enough for Chuck Norris, so he got Immortal Kombat.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
The smoothie was invented when Chuck Norris needed information from a banana.