Chuck Norris doesn't use anti-virus. Viruses use anti-Chuck Norris.
Two things in life are certain: Death and a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris inhales carbon monoxide and exhales oxygen.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun. The Earth is stationary. The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
Chuck Norris once drank a Red Bull and the can grew wings.
Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
Guns need a licence to bear Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar.