Chuck Norris steps into the confession booth. The Priests confess his sins.
Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
Santa Claus goes to the mall to sit on Chuck Norris' lap.
Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.
A group of children once said, "Red rover, red rover, send Chuck Norris over." Those children were the dinosaurs.
When you have a question you check with Google. When Google has a question they check with Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris has a question everybody better run!
Chuck Norris can open Microsoft Windows when he needs fresh air.
Chuck Norris' day consists of 25 hours.