When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
Chuck Norris was bitten by a werewolf. When full moon came, the werewolf turned into Chuck Norris.
The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
Chuck Norris can't be in a 3D movie because the entire room would feel his roundhouse kicks.
King Kong climbed the Empire State Building because Chuck Norris was waiting at the bottom.
Chuck Norris can only text if the phone's touch screen is bullet proof.
Only Chuck Norris can tell you the answer to your question before you ask it.
Chuck Norris can smoke underwater.
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.