The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
Chuck Norris can only text if the phone's touch screen is bullet proof.
Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
Chuck Norris' feminine side is manlier than the manliest man's manly side.
Chuck Norris never uses a navigation system. The direction he is heading is ALWAYS the right direction.
Fire trucks and ambulances pull to the shoulder when chuck Norris drives by.
Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.
Death once took Chuck Norris. He regreted it.
Chuck Norris made an armless man tap out.