The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.
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Chuck Norris can scratch sandpaper.
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Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
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Chuck Norris couldn't act in Titanic because he would have saved everyone.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF! Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
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Chuck Norris once killed a man in New York while practicing Bruce Lee's one inch punch... Chuck Norris was in San Franscisco at the time.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
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Harry Potter needs 8 movies to seek and destroy Voldemort. Chuck Norris needs 4 seconds.
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911 calls Chuck Norris for emergency.
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Chuck Norris knows what color a smurf turns when you choke it.
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