Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
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Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
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When Chuck Norris went to the beach, he gave the ocean a bath.
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Usain Bolt only began running when he heard, Chuck Norris was in Jamaica shooting a commercial for Red Bull.
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Chuck Norris went for a swim in the ocean.
The sharks headed for land.
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Chuck Norris made the universe... out of his snot and left kidney.
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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King and got one.
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Chuck Norris didn't grow a beard, a beard grew Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris made Journey stop beleiving.
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Chuck Norris commited suicide, and lived.
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