The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris invented the printing press by putting two pieces of blank paper together.
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris and Justin Bieber once had a singing contest, the loser had to never hit puberty.
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has 66.43 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, music
The role of terminator was originaly played by Chuck Norris, but they decided against it as no-one would want to shit their pants for two hours strait.
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has 66.21 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris actually completed Tetris.
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has 66.21 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, game
Dreams about Chuck Norris are in 4D.
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has 66.14 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, pirate
Crest fights cavities, Chuck Norris kills them.
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The two thousand member Catholic church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The priest was ready to start the Mass when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church. One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!" Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the alter boy. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The priest was holding steady in the pulpit. The men put their weapons away and said, gently, "All right, Father, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the Mass."
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has 66.01 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: catholic, christian, Chuck Norris, vulgar
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