Chuck Norris' toothpaste doesn't have baking soda in it, it has gunpowder in it.
Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same. Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
Chuck Norris didn't go to school to learn, he went to teach.
Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
Local mountain lions have been complaining about the recent string of Chuck Norris attacks.
All wars stopped when Chuck Norris said, "Can I apply for the army?"
Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
Some people can ride their bikes with no handle bars. But chuck norris can ride his handlebars with no bike.
Chuck Norris does not open doors. Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him