The best Chuck Norris jokes

Global warming is caused by transient energy leftover from Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF! Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
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Chuck Norris once killed a man in New York while practicing Bruce Lee's one inch punch... Chuck Norris was in San Franscisco at the time.
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Chuck Norris can send you a roundhouse kick by E-Mail.
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Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
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Chuck Norris had never escape from jail. Jail escapes from Chuck Norris.
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In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague. The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
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Chuck Norris can finish Sims.
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According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
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Chuck Norris can turn diamonds back into coal.
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