To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.
Chuck Norris destroyed the Lord of Rings. Twice.
Some check under their beds for "Penny Wise the Clown" before to sleep. Penny Wise the Clown checks for Chuck Norris under his bed before going to sleep.
Once Chuck Norris went back in time and kicked a ball. When it landed it wiped out the dinosaurs.
Chuck Norris once stared death in the face... Death pissed his pants.
Do you know why the Earth's spinning ? Because Chuck Norris is running on it.
Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
If looks could kill they would be called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
Chuck Norris can keep up with the Kardashians.