Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
Contrary to popular belief there was a Chuck Norris sighting on the set of The Crow. No Lee is allowed to live when Chuck Norris is around.
Chuck Norris doesn't jump. He moves the ground away from him.
When Chuck Norris steps on a crack he breaks another persons mother's back.
Chuck Norris doesn't go to therapy, therapy goes to Chuck Norris.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
Once an email was sent from LA to Washington. Chuck Stopped it at St. Louis.
Evolution's driving mechanism is nature's desperate attempt to escape Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris burns calories, he uses a flamethrower.
Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.