The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris took a nap. The result was the Great Depression.
When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris commited suicide, and lived.
Chuck Norris is ambidextrous. He can do Roundhouse kicks with his left and right leg. All at the same time.
Do you know why the Earth's spinning ? Because Chuck Norris is running on it.
Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
Stonehenge was made by Chuck Norris stacking blocks as a baby.