When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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Armageddon is defined as the day Chuck Norris gets bored with us.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones but Chuck Norris' fists will kill you.
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If Chuck Norris had to he could give CPR to himself.
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Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
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When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
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Chuck Norris doesn't think he's better than everyone, everyone thinks Chuck Norris is better than them.
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Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs.
They come on when HE wants them to.
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Chuck Norris Doesn't breakdance.
He breaks dance
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