Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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Chuck Norris can obtain unobtainable.
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Chuck Norris blows out trick candles.
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When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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You can't win a starring contest with Chuck Norris becuase when you look in to his eyes you see hell starring right back at you.
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Chuck Norris goes on Jeopardy and doesn't answer in the form of a question.
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When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
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Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
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When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can make same magnet polarities stick together.
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