Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
Chuck Norris won the gold, silver and bronze medals at the Olympics. In the same event. From home.
Chuck Norris can lie honestly.
When Chuck Norris plays hangman, he decides what the word is.
Chuck Norris can send you a roundhouse kick by E-Mail.
The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.
Chuck Norris can literally kill time.
In the Matrix, the bullets try to dodge Chuck Norris - and fail.