Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
Chuck Norris once sued a Law and Order Company because those are the trademark item names of his right and left legs.
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Chuck Norris can drive a solar-powered car at night.
Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
If Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you, even Google won't be able to find you.
Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
It is a fact that Chuck Norris cannot cry, this is because his tearducts are too muscular.