Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
Chuck Norris couldn't act in Titanic because he would have saved everyone.
Out of 500 fights Chuck Norris has won 600.
Chuck Norris once sued a Law and Order Company because those are the trademark item names of his right and left legs.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Chuck Norris can drive a solar-powered car at night.
Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
If Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you, even Google won't be able to find you.
Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.