Angelina Jolie can curve a bullet. Chuck Norris can curve a laser.
Chuck Norris shaves with a hunting knife. "Shaving" consists of cutting a new mouth-hole every morning. That's how tough his beard is.
When Chuck Norris is in Rome, they do what he does.
Chuck Norris once bowled a 300... Without a ball... He wasn't even in a bowling ally.
Chuck Norris walked his version of a 40-yard dash in 5.6 seconds; he was later told it was the Boston Marathon.
Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls... He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
Superman is faster then a speeding bullet. Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine. We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
Chuck Norris narrates Morgan Freemans life
Chuck Norris is the only man who can put M&M's in alphabetical order.