Lightning doesn't strike Chuck Norris, chuck norris strikes lightning!
On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
Messing with Chuck Norris is the only thing that will get you disqualified from a Colonial Penn Life Insurance policy - at any age.
Chuck Norris once separated his powers into five people, they are now called The Avengers.
Chuck Norris can access private methods.
There was once a ship that wouldn't let chuck norris on board. It is now known as titanic
Chuck Norris took a nap. The result was the Great Depression.
When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine. We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.