Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
The beatles originally said they were "Bigger than Chuck Norris", John Lennon was simply a warning.
Chuck Norris can clog the toilet with his pee.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them
When cops pull Chuck Norris over, THEY try to talk THEIR way out of it.
Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
Chuck Norris uses the lethal injection to have a 5min nap.
When raining, Chuck Norris doesn't need an umbrella , he can dodge the rain drops.
Chuck Norris can't fly, gravity just looks the other way when he leaves the ground.