Chuck Norris doesn't need to mow his lawn, He dares the grass to grow.
Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.
Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet. That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
When you come to a road that says "ONE WAY", that mean Chuck Norris is the other way.
Chuck Norris doesn't cry. His eyes sweat.
In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
Chuck Norris once won a game of Space Invaders without shooting.
The ground hog only pokes his head out to check for Chuck Norris.
Electricity pays Chuck Norris to light up his house.
The second hardest element in the universe is Chuck Norris. The first only comes into existance when Chuck gets excited.