Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever. That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
The world did not have a tilt in its axis until Chuck Norris stubbed his toe on the North Pole.
The best part of waking up is not the Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
Spider-man can crawl on walls and ceilings, Chuck Norris can crawl on water.
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg was recently hospitalize, because Chuck Norris poked him.
Chuck Norris has never used a question mark in his life.
Chuck Norris can finish Sims.
Chuck Norris fires Donald Trump.
The Dead Sea was formerly known as The Living Sea. Until it met Chuck Norris.